Oh puh-lease

[khaosworks]

UK sets Iraq key tests

The UK has set out six conditions that Iraq must fulfil to avoid war, calling for them to be attached to a new UN Security Council resolution.

Answering questions in Parliament, the Prime Minister, Tony Blair, said it was essential that all resolutions and conditions be met.

The six new tests of disarmament include demands for Saddam Hussein to make a public statement admitting he has weapons of mass destruction (WMD) and for Baghdad to allow scientists to be questioned abroad.

The proposals came as London sought to dispel speculation that US troops might go to war with Iraq without British involvement, following controversial remarks by US Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.

Mr Rumsfeld sparked confusion on Tuesday by saying that American forces were prepared to act without British support.

Addressing MPs, Mr Blair said it was in the British national interest to take action against Iraq.

He said it was not a question of the US going it alone, but of supporting a UN policy of disarmament in Iraq.

And the six benchmarks are...

UK BENCHMARKS FOR IRAQ

• Saddam must come clean about WMD in public
  
• 30 scientists must be allowed to be interviewed abroad
  
• Stocks of anthrax and other material must be identified
  
• Al-Samoud missiles and their engines must be destroyed
  
• Drones must be accounted for
  
• Mobile bio-warfare laboratories must be surrendered

A public confession that he's hidden WMD in the past? Take it from someone who does criminal mediation with neighbors who poop routinely on each others' lawn and have nursed grudges for thirty years... IT AIN'T GONNA WORK, JACK.

Public confession. I swear, what are these guys on?

Comments

[almeda.livejournal.com]

John heard that on NPR this morning, and said, "Why don't they just say he has to stand on one leg outside the girl's bathroom and whistle Dixie? He's not going to *do* it, and they just need him to tell them to piss off so they can bomb him."

[hrrunka]

*sigh* This Government loves setting up tests like the five economic ones that have to be achieved before they'll consider joining the euro. It's a way of justifying a whim, far as I can tell...

[missfairchild.livejournal.com]

I no longer bother to read The Onion. I get far more laughs from the BBC website these days, even if the parodies are a little far-fetched at times.