khaosworks: (Tardis)
[personal profile] khaosworks
First ever Doctor Who fanfic. May your judgment be merciful, or swift.

The Fourth Doctor: Romana Before Christmas

"Romana, we've landed!"

The Doctor called out to her as he flicked the switches that turned on the TARDIS scanner. Romana breezed into the console room, almost hopping with enthusiasm. The Doctor observed that since her regeneration, the young Time Lady had developed a slightly flightier, more playful personality. He hadn't quite decided if it was an improvement or not.

"Right," she said, looking at the scanner, the picture blurry as the Doctor focussed in and out. "Where's the randomiser landed us this time?"

"That's what I'm trying to find out," the Doctor said, checking the instruments. "Scanner's a little... snowy. The coordinates look familiar, though. Oxygen-nitrogen atmosphere... balance looks right... Ah!"

"What?" Romana spun around, wide-eyed.

"I've discovered why the scanner is a little snowy."

"Why?" she asked, a tinge of worry in her voice.

The Doctor grinned. "Because it's snowing outside." She relaxed, and gave him a look. "Get your coat on," he told her, "You're going to enjoy this."

The snowflakes glowed in the light of the streetlamps as the two time travellers stepped out of the police box. A light layer of white covered everything, while just beyond the alley where the TARDIS had landed, bright multicoloured lights flashed and beckoned.

They stood looking out of the alley into the street beyond. Strung across it and between the buildings were even more lights, red, green and yellow, some blinking in patterns. All around, people moved back and forth, quickly, wrapped up in winter clothes, some carrying bags, some with boxes in their arms.

Romana looked puzzled. "Where are we?" she said, pulling her jacket tighter around her.

"Earth," the Doctor announced, throwing the end of his scarf over his shoulder, "Sometime in the early 21st century, I should say, judging by the pollution."

"All this activity... is there some kind of crisis going on?"

"Crisis?" the Doctor cast her a glance, then looked thoughtful, "Well... you could say that. It's the last night for shopping. Tomorrow's Christmas Day."

"Christmas?"

"An Earth festival. Celebrating the winter solstice, and the birth of one of their deities. Sort of like Otherstide, back home. You remember Otherstide dinner, don't you? Ghastly relatives you never see the rest of the year, banal conversation about which cousin is getting better marks at the Academy..."

"Dining on leftover Flutterwing for the next three spans..."

"Exactly."

"And Christmas is like that, is it?" Romana asked warily.

"Yes... well, no." The Doctor shifted his weight to the other leg, and tilted his head, "A bit. Depends, really. It actually can be rather nice. Come on..."

The Doctor took her hand, her delicate fingers feeling almost ridiculously small compared to his as they stepped out into the street. On the corner a man dressed up in a Santa suit stood next to a donations bucket, ringing his bell. Through a window, they could see shop assistants ringing up purchases and wrapping them in shiny gift paper. Outside another building were a group of carollers, voice raised in harmony and singing "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen."

Romana tried to remember her primitive anthropology classes and struggled to analyse what she was seeing. "Are they buying sacrifices for this deity whose birth you said they were celebrating?"

"No," the Doctor said, shaking his head, "These are gifts, which they'll exchange with each other. Christmas is about peace on Earth and goodwill toward men. It's the one time of the year that everyone is nice to each other."

"Aren't they the rest of the time?"

"They are... they do, but Christmas gives them an added excuse to be."

Romana furrowed her brow, "How odd. One would think that you were either a nice person or you weren't. Why create an excuse if you don't really mean it?"

"Now that's judging them too harshly," the Doctor said. "Humans are primitive but complex creatures. Sometimes it's easier for them to attribute things to an outside agency, or to create an occasion for them to express their love for each other without being accused of wanting something in return."

"Isn't that slightly hypocritical?"

"It might be, but it isn't. Not on Christmas." The Doctor smiled, "That's the magic of it all."

"Well, I don't need an excuse to be nice," Romana said, haughtily. Something then caught her eye, and she pointed across the street at a couple under a decorative arch of holly. "What are they doing?"

The Doctor narrowed his eyes, peering. "They're kissing. There's mistletoe hanging on the holly — another Christmas tradition. Any two people who meet under hanging mistletoe are obliged to kiss each other."

Romana looked up at the Doctor. "Another excuse?"

"I suppose," he conceded, "It's a harmless way to gauge affection without any expectations getting in the way. Humans seem to need excuses to do the simplest things, I admit."

"Doctor?"

"Mmm?"

She pointed up. There was a wreath on the wall just above them, and a sprig of mistletoe hanging off it.

The Doctor looked, and simply said, "Oh."

"Oh," repeated Romana.

There was a pause. She gave a sigh, "I'm glad Time Lords don't need excuses..." She locked her gaze to his, "...to do the simplest things."

"No," said the Doctor slowly, "We don't."

They looked up again, staring at the mistletoe, hand in hand, for a very long time.

Date: 2005-11-29 01:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] autographedcat.livejournal.com
Very sweet. I like it. :)

Date: 2005-11-29 03:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] marag.livejournal.com
Awww, how cute! I like the Doctor trying to explain those silly humans :)

Date: 2005-11-29 04:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pbristow.livejournal.com
Oh, you cruel sod! WHAT HAPPENED NEXT, DAMMIT?!? =:o>

Very nice. You've caught TomDoc's mode of speech well, although hearing him use the word "love" in any sense other than "thorough enjoyment of a non-sentient phenomenon" feels very odd - Actually acknowledging that "love" might be something that occurs between *people*...

It's moments like that that make you realise how throughly Tom wove his doctrine of "[The Doctor] can't suddenly become interested in romance; He doesn't have those sorts of emotions" into every fibre of the character he played. It's what makes the relatively mild declaration of "you are wonderful!", in "State of Decay", seem so shockingly 'shippy. The only person he'd ever paid that kind of compliment to before was the TARDIS! =:o}

Date: 2005-11-29 10:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
I'll swap it for "compassion". That word has a fine tradition in Who.

Date: 2005-11-30 12:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pbristow.livejournal.com
Well... Maybe changing it is not the right thing to do. It jars, but thenm the jarring sets your spidey-'shippy senses tingfling ready for the ending...

Hey, you could make it the world's first interactive fanfic: 'Before reading the story, you must select the word you want to appear during a critical piece of dialogue. Push button (a) for the word "love". Push button (b) for "compassion". Press now!'

=:o}

Date: 2005-11-30 01:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Mmm. Fair point.

Date: 2005-11-29 04:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pbristow.livejournal.com
P.S. Am I allowed to link to this? [WAGGLES EYEBROWS HOPEFULLY]

Date: 2005-11-29 10:11 pm (UTC)

Date: 2005-11-29 06:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] torchwolf.livejournal.com
Very good sir!

Nicely atmospheric, fun, and good observations about humans and Christmas.


I hope there'll be more where this came from - we can do with more grown up male fic writers!

Date: 2005-11-29 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] querldox.livejournal.com
What, no Dalek porn? That's apparently all the rage now. :- )

Date: 2005-11-29 11:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
"LU-BRI-CATE!"

I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 01:24 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
1. But can anyone tell me, why do *females* in Doctor Who appear stupid, if not downright silly!? It seems that they are only there to counter-balance the already too much male ego scenes..

2. Are there any female characters with hero-like qualities appearing in Doctor Who?

3. (Please don't ask me to go see Baywatch..)

[posted by a feminist, feeling rather upset and protesting vehemently at the vase-like roles of her counterparts in Doctor Who..]

Re: I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 07:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
No, that's a fair question. It certainly seems that females in Doctor Who appear stupid, but this is a matter of stereotyping rather than reality. In fact, very few women characters are specifically written as being stupid. Rather, it's the function of the companion archetype that requires them to ask questions and let the Doctor explain in order to advance the plot. Jamie, Steven, Ian, Turlough, strapping men all (well, maybe not Turlough) played the role of hostage and questioner as well.

Let's run down the women in Doctor Who: Susan was a schoolgirl, so in context her helplessness makes a bit of sense. Barbara was a schoolteacher, and possessed of extraordinary will - she tried change the course of Aztec history, for pete's sake! Then came Vicki, a Susan substitute who had enough influence on the Doctor to persuade the old man to let Ian and Barbara go home, even though it broke his heart; Katarina, the poor innocent who sacrificed herself to save them all; Sara Kingdom, the tough talking, butt kicking Space Security Agent who lived for the Daleks' destruction.

Okay, Polly was a bit useless, and Victoria a bit wet, although the former was a 60s blonde and the latter a Victorian lady, so again in context it's understandable. Zoe Heriot was a prodigy from the 21st century who was admittedly smarter than the Doctor. Liz Shaw was a Cambridge scientist with umpteen degrees. Jo Grant started out ditzy and scatterbrained, but grew stronger and more mature, leaving to marry Dr. Clifford Jones and dedicate herself to ecological research.

Sarah Jane Smith - oh, Sarah. Feisty, a feminist, sharp tongued and never any less than capable. Leela the warrior woman, uneducated but never stupid. Romana, the inexperienced Time Lady, who left the Doctor to become a righter or wrongs on her own.

Then came Tegan, the mouth on legs, who unfortunately was never written well and just came off as bitchy. Nyssa was gentle, compassionate an accomplished scientist, and left to help cure a disease on a leper colony ship.

Then came a couple of mildly irritating female companions. Peri... well, Peri was intentional eye-candy, and never progressed much beyond that, though Lord knows Nicola Bryant, who played her, tried. Melanie Bush was a computer programmer, had a photographic memory, but didn't last very long either.

Then came Ace. Beautiful, crazy Ace, tough, streetwise, eager to learn from her "Professor" always watching his back and applying the lessons she learned. After that, Dr. Grace Holloway, who was a doctor and a cardiologist, and finally Rose, who, well, saves the world. Several times.

I'm not saying there haven't been a few hiccups along the way, but overall, the women companions are never stereotypes, and they almost always leave the Doctor changed for the better. There's an article by Kate Orman in Doctor Who Magazine #363 which also talks about it, probably better than I have. There has been sexism in Doctor Who, sometimes of the worst variety, but they have to been seen in the context of the times, as well as the fact that the stories were primarily written by men. That being said, some of the women characters have been very progessive, as mentioned.

I honestly hope that Romana didn't come off as stupid in what I wrote above. She's simply ignorant of human customs, unlike the Doctor who has made a study of humanity. There's a distinction there, which if I didn't manage to get across, I apologise for.

I hope this addresses some of your concerns. Feel free to ask more.

Re: I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 12:34 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
[Me] Perhaps one day you'd be minded to write a female Doctor, who made the male companions come out better. In that story, the she-Doctor should be able to answer her he-companions' questions. If you need some justification on this, you could base her on a mother figure, a mother who's is wise and compassionate and... [ZZzzzzp!]

[Silence]

[Fans protest] Hang on a minute! Who wants to be in their fantasy world with their MOTHER???? I want to be a (he)ro! I want a time-flying machine and a beautiful companion whose existence is just to push the plot along! Thats why I read sci-fic -- to escape from my reality (of ear twisting wives and domineering mothers)! DOH! BAN THIS THOUGHT AT ONCE!!

[Khaosworks shrugs his shoulders..] See? We cannot risk the Who-fans boycotting. No one will buy Who's merchandise, books, DVDs. You should just stick to the real world. At least some women are beginning to have a say or two. Only some. Only beginning. And only a say or two. And there are some who do not need the Doc to come out better. Really.

Re: I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Actually, people have talked about a female Doctor for a very long time. The Big Finish productions Doctor Who Unbound CD audio play Exile featured an alternate Doctor who had regenerated into a female. Joanna Lumley played a female Doctor in the spoof Doctor Who and the Curse of Fatal Death done for Comic Relief in 1999. And there's a whole series of relatively good fan fiction written around that female Doctor (see http://www.timelady.tk/).

It's interesting that you presume to be able to predict my reactions and thoughts, though. Should I even be part of a conversation or have you already written my script for me?

I find that women don't appreciate being reduced to gender or fan stereotypes. I would suggest that neither do men.

Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 01:00 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I sincerely apologise for my rude behaviour and stereotyping. Perhaps you would care to share your reaction/ thoughts?

So is Iris Wildthyme the Time Lord and a Doctor?

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 01:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Well, I already did - I pointed out that while it's easy to look at Doctor Who and start assuming sexism, it doesn't really hold up on closer examination. Nothing is as simple as it seems once you get down to it. You'd be hard pressed to call Liz Shaw, or Sara Kingdom, or Sarah Jane Smith a stereotype, in the same way that you'd be hard pressed to say that Ace, Zoe, Rose, Katarina, or even Jo, weren't heroic.

I think you really need to examine the series properly before you can reach the conclusion that Doctor Who is sexist and panders to adolescent male fantasies, and I'd say that it doesn't at all. That's not the audience for the programme, and has never been.

Iris isn't "a" Doctor. The Doctor is not a type of character, that's the character's name. Iris is a separate character in her own right, and describing her gets... complicated because of the nature of the character. Read the link to Wikipedia; that'll explain it in more detail.

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 06:40 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I'm ashamed. Actually I'm only reading my first ever copy of Doctor Who story -- "Doctor Who and the Empire of Glass". And I pretend to know alot about the series, or the stories, or the characters. I do apologise to all the Doc's fans out there, Khaosworks did a very good job defending the Doc and the ladies with him. I could never be that good but from now on, I'll try to at least read all the stories for the next discussion. Till then!

[still a feminist, but one who needs to get her facts right first..]

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-10 01:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
This actually explains a lot. What you have to realise is that Empire of Glass is a spin-off novel based on the series. Whether it "counts" as far as the television show is concerned is also debatable (kind of like whether the Star Trek novels count as being officially part of the show).

The canon debate aside, Doctor Who is a television show that has lasted for forty-two years, literally hundreds of stories written, now has had ten actors in the title role, and is ever-changing.

(besides, Empire of Glass isn't even one of my favourites. Andy Lane's okay, but not great.)

I and other editors have been working hard on the Doctor Who pages on Wikipedia. Why don't you sit down, start at Doctor Who and read on a bit from there if you're interested? And I'll be glad to try and answer any more queries, or point you to places where those queries can be answered.

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-10 12:13 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
The Wikipedia on Doctor was useful! Thanks very much "o)

I actually find it diffult to read the Empire. Do I have to watch the television series to know the stories? Are there hard copies/novels of the stories based on the actual television series I could read from?

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-10 12:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
We have a bunch of synopses up on Wikipedia - there are a lot, so not all of them are complete. But the latest season, 2005, is, and it's a new start for the show, so it should be more accessible.

Needing to watch the show to know the stories: I'm presuming you mean do you need to have watched the programme to read the novels. Well, it really depends. Obviously, you should be familiar with the basic premise, but in the main, most of them are original stories so it should be okay. Novelisations of the television shows were produced in the 70s and 80s, but most of them are now out of print and are now only available through eBay.

But the television series is what you really should be watching. We also have a listing of available DVDs in Wikipedia.

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-10 01:51 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Mm.. many choices of DVDs available in Amazon.com. I think I'll go for Tom Baker to start me off. (\_/ keep my fingers crossed!)

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-12 02:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] susanscookietin.livejournal.com
I was reading more of Empire of Glass and realised, could it be describing the political situation of us human beings at that time? Jamarians (like the S. Americans and Aficans, with no power base and a minor race and rather condescendingly, "tendency towards paranoia and stupidity") and the other aliens being the super powers at that time (European countries)?

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-12 03:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Hmm. Maybe, but I wouldn't give Andy Lane that much credit. I read Empire when it first came out about 10 years ago and didn't like it. Bit of a mess, really, but then I'm not fond of Dodo as a character, either.

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-12 10:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Oh, I'm sorry. I meant Vicki.

Re: Now, I really didn't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-19 01:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] susanscookietin.livejournal.com
I finished the Empire of Glass last night. You're right it that it is quite messy, esp towards the end. The middle was ok. Andy was trying to describe some gay relationship in the book, and I suspect Scientology as well..

Re: I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 01:12 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I retract the question. Just read "Time Lord". Thanks

Re: I don't mean to be rude..

Date: 2005-12-09 12:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khaosworks.livejournal.com
Also, if you want to hear or read the adventures of a rather unique Time Lady, you can always look up Iris Wildthyme on the net. You can start with the Wikipedia entry I wrote at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iris_Wildthyme

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